The Vending Machine
| Category: | Physical Comedy & Slapstick |
|---|---|
| Category: | Technology & Modern Life |
| Props: | Pitcher of water, paper cups, quarters |
| Notes: | This skit requires good timing and physical comedy. The Vending Machine Scout must hold poses and make mechanical movements. The final water spit gets a great reaction. Have towels ready! |
([Scout] enters looking parched.)
[Scout:] I'm dying of thirst! Water! Water! What's this? Aeft. A vending machine?
([Vending Machine] is a Scout holding a pitcher of water and a cup.)
[Vending Mach:] DEPOSIT TWENTY-FIVE CENTS PLEASE.
(The vending machine is a Scout holding a pitcher of water and a cup.)
[Scout:] Twenty-five cents? Oh. Hmm.
(He takes a quarter out and puts it in the guy's pocket.)
[Vending Mach:] The machine holds out the glass, holds out the pitcher, and mechanically pours the water into the space right next to the glass, missing the glass and pouring on the ground. The Scout desperately tries to grab the water being poured on the ground. The Scout starts to take it, but before he does the machine turns the glass upside down, dumping the water on the ground. The Scout scrambles for the water on the ground, but doesn't get any.
[Scout:] Water! Water!
[Vending Mach:] DEPOSIT TWENTY-FIVE CENTS PLEASE.
(The Scout digs in his pockets, finds another quarter. He puts it in the machine's shirt pocket. The machine holds out the glass, holds out the pitcher, and mechanically pours water into glass. WATER! The Scout starts to take it, but before he does the machine turns the glass upside down, dumping the water on the ground.)
([Scout:] Water! How do I get water out of this stupid machine?)
[Vending Mach:] DEPOSIT TWENTY-FIVE CENTS PLEASE.
(The Scout digs in his pockets, finds another quarter. He puts it in the machine's shirt pocket. The machine holds out the glass, holds out)
(After digging in both pockets I've only got one quarter left. I better get some water this time! The Scout places his last quarter in the machine's pocket, and the machine spits water in his face (the machine stored it in its cheeks when it drank the previous glass).)
(Freeze. Blackout.)