Bell Ringer #1
| Category: | Classic Run-On / One-Liners |
|---|---|
| Category: | Wordplay & Puns |
| Props: | None needed |
| Notes: | The Scout should really sell the exhaustion after all that climbing. The timing on the final line is key-pause just long enough before the reveal. Simple but effective! |
([Boss] stands at center stage. [Scout] walks up enthusiastically.)
[Scout:] Excuse me, sir! I'd like to apply for the job as your bell ringer!
[Boss:] A bell ringer, eh? It's hard work, you know. You have to climb all the way up to the top of the tower and ring the bell.
[Scout:] Oh, I can do it! I'm strong and I love to climb!
[Boss:] Well, let's see if you can. The bell tower is this way. Follow me!
(Both walk to one side of stage.)
[Boss:] All right, up you go! All the way to the top!
([Scout] begins miming climbing stairs, getting more and more tired. Climbs and climbs, breathing heavily, wiping brow, leaning against the wall to rest, then climbing more.)
([Boss] watches from below, checking watch, tapping foot.)
(Finally, [Scout] reaches the top, completely exhausted, panting heavily.)
[Scout:] I... made it... to... the top!
[Boss:] Good! Now ring the bell!
([Scout] looks around frantically, searching for something.)
[Scout:] Um... where's the rope?
[Boss:] What rope?
[Scout:] The rope to ring the bell! Where is it?
[Boss:] There is no rope! You have to ring it with your hands!
[Scout:] Oh! Okay!
([Scout] positions himself, then runs face-first into an imaginary bell, making a "BONNNNNG" sound as his head hits it. Staggers back, dazed.)
[Boss:] That's good! But do it again-louder this time!
([Scout] backs up, runs faster, hits the bell harder with his face: "BONNNNNNNG!" Staggers back more dramatically, very dazed.)
[Boss:] Excellent! One more time-really loud!
([Scout] backs way up, runs at full speed, hits the bell with huge force: "BONNNNNNNNNNNG!" Falls backward and collapses on the ground.)
([Boss] rushes over, looking down at [Scout].)
[Boss:] Oh no! He's knocked himself out cold!
([Bystander] runs over to look.)
[Bystander:] Who is he? Do you know his name?
[Boss:] No, but his face rings a bell!
(Freeze. Blackout.)