Gone Home: A Memorial Ceremony for a Scout or Scouter
| Category: | Scout Ceremonies |
|---|---|
| Props: | Small table with a photo of the person (if the family agrees) |
| Props: | One candle, lit |
| Props: | Smooth stones, one per person attending, in a basket |
| Props: | A larger flat stone, or a circle laid out with rope, to build the trail sign on |
| Props: | Their neckerchief or another Scout item (if the family offers it) |
| Notes: | A troop or pack memorial, not a funeral. Talk with the family first: whether they want this, whether they want to come, and what may be said. Say nothing about the circumstances beyond what they have made public. Have the chartered organization's clergy, a counselor, or another trusted adult present, and let parents know ahead of time. The circle with a dot in the middle is the Scout trail sign for "I have gone home" - it is carved on Baden-Powell's grave in Kenya. If the family's faith calls for a prayer, use it in place of the silence. For the first meeting after the loss, see remembrance-one-of-our-own (a Scout) or remembrance-a-leader-we-lost (an adult leader). |
Setup
Gather in a circle - outdoors if you can, at a place the person loved. Place the table with the photo and the lit candle at one side of the circle. Lay the flat stone or rope circle in the center, and give everyone a stone as they arrive.
Participants
- Leader - the Scoutmaster, Cubmaster, or the leader who knew them best
- Senior Patrol Leader or Den Chief - reads the trail sign meaning
- Everyone present - places a stone
The Ceremony
Leader: 'We are here for [NAME]. Thank you for coming. Whatever you are feeling tonight - sad, angry, numb, or not sure - you are welcome in this circle just as you are.'
Leader: 'Scouts have always used signs on the trail to tell the ones behind them where they went. Arrows for the path, an X for "not this way." There is one more sign, and it is the last one on any trail.'
SPL: 'It is a circle with a single stone in the center. It means "I have gone home." When Baden-Powell, the founder of Scouting, died in 1941, this sign was carved on his grave.'
Leader: 'We are going to make that sign together, for [NAME]. One at a time, come forward and set your stone on the circle. If you want to say something - a memory, a word, their name - you can. If you would rather place it in silence, that is just as good.'
(One by one, people place their stones around the edge of the circle. Do not hurry this. Let silences be silences.) (When everyone has placed a stone, the Leader places the last stone in the center.)Leader: '[NAME] has gone home.'
(Pause.)Leader: 'They kept the Scout Law in their own way, and we saw it. Let us say it now, for them.'
(All recite the Scout Law together. Cub Scouts may say the Scout Law or the Cub Scout motto.)Leader: 'Let us have a moment of silence.'
(Silence, about thirty seconds. If a bugler or recording is available, play Taps instead - see Campfire Closing #7 - Taps.)Leader: 'This trail sign will stay here. So will what [NAME] gave this troop. Thank you for being here. Stay as long as you need.'
(The candle is left burning, or blown out by a family member or the Leader, as the family prefers.)For leaders: Grief can bring a crisis with it, for Scouts and for adults. If anyone is struggling or talking about harming themselves, get help right away. In the US, call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, free and available 24/7. Outside the US, Find A Helpline lists free, confidential helplines by country.